Write In Between

Monday, May 19, 2008

Post-graduate musings: so what do I know?

So what do I know? There are so many ways to phrase that question:
So WHAT do I know? So, what DO I know? So, what do I know?
On the educational process...

...That the more I know, the more I realize how much I don't know.

...That I don't necessarily feel smarter, just better informed. I might still stumble around in the dark at times, but now I know better where to start looking for the light switch.
...I know that daring to dream is easier than accomplishing a goal. You need the first for inspiration because the second requires perspiration.
...That you are never too old to learn.
...That it doesn't matter how fast or how slow you can read... it's what you retain that matters.
...That when you get to do something you thought was unlikely--like going back to school after age 40 for a degree--that you really appreciate the gift of that education!

...That losing a paper you forgot to "save" in a documents file is worse than losing your eyeglasses. I am embarrassed to say that I have done both multiple times in the course of pursuing my degree. Either my middle-aged brain is overloaded with too much stuff, or else, it has no retension and has sprung a leak! In both cases you deal with tears in front of a blank unreadable screen.

On studying theology...
...I know that no one should enter into studying theology lightly. It is so much more than mere subject matter. It has the power to change you. It will draw you in and either bind your heart and mind like a relentless lover, or you will walk away shaking your head in disbelief. But you will return again and again to the well which never runs dry, and you will drink deeply of it again. For when you know the Source of such refreshment, you can never fully escape its intoxication. Let's just say that's something I never experienced when I took economics, or calculus, or even my beloved music lessons.

...With theology, you have to pray a lot. If the prayer is missing, you might as well not show up to class.

...Theology will stretch you. If it doesn't kill you first (in a kind of white martyrdom-like way.)

...You realize that now that you know this stuff, you have a responsibility to share this. This is not a lone pursuit. It is a communion.

...Just when you think you have finally penetrated a truth, a deeper truth emerges and you are seeking once again. The trick is to keep following Christ and His Church.

...The next trick is to realize that you will never know it all. That is why there are specialties within theology. My personal leanings are toward dogmatic theology, Mariology, and spirituality. All discreet disciplines which in and of themselves could lead to their own PhD.

On what comes next...
...THE SUMMER! The first in four years that I don't have to study! But I will, kinda, see what's next!

...Definitely reading the 80+ books I've placed on hold until I was done with school.

...Definitely writing and finding a new rhythm to work that muscle in ways beyond research.

...Updating the resume and looking for new employment paths.

...Taking care of my health, and my home.

Our Lady, Seat of Wisdom, pray for me!

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